The definition of ‘mother’ – a female or thing that creates, nurtures, protects, etc
You’ll have to forgive me, dear Reader. I’m not usually one for writing these sorts of posts but I felt compelled to scribble something down for Mother’s Day in the face of spending time with some truly wonderful women this week. For me, being a mother sees me wearing many guises, day after day, week to week, year on year. I can mostly be found shouting ‘Bugger’ loudly at the most inappropriate moment, accidentally giving Poppy a lesson from Mummy’s very own phonics programme (‘t’ is for tonic water according to nursery – I’m lucky she hasn’t shared the other sounds), making Primrose cringe with embarrassment whenever or wherever I am with her, never remembering the permission slip or which day the kit needs to be in school and so on and so on. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that as a mother I would have to turn my hand to plate spinning whilst doing a handstand, trying to work full time, making the tea, helping with homework, making sure there is food in the fridge, washing, ironing, inventing stories on the hop and all whilst listening to Primrose’s piano practice. Somehow it all seems to happen though. Well, apart from the handstand – I am RUBBISH at anything sport related…..oh and the plate spinning….no one can really do that, can they? Anyway, the point is that I’m not superwoman, far from it. I wish I was but somehow I seem to get through it one disaster at a time. Motherhood is constantly testing me. I shout too often, don’t listen enough, struggle to remain patient and would sometimes rather be face down in a large gin and tonic/book/cup of tea/bottle of wine/slice of cake (you can see where my priorities lie, dear Reader…) than answering to the whims of the
tiara-wearing terrorists gorgeous girls I have miraculously managed to produce. Those are the very same girls who have taught ME a great deal. They make me want to live up to that definition of a mother, as despite all my faults, they love me and for that I will be eternally thankful.
Anyhow, back to the reason for this rather unusual post from me. This week I witnessed that very definition of motherhood in action and spent time with some truly remarkable ladies – ladies who take the word ‘mother’ and smash it, no matter what is thrown at them. Ladies for whom I have the utmost admiration, love and respect. They are the people worthy of flowers, champagne and chocolate on a day of honouring mothers and I want to remind myself of them and many more besides who otherwise might not feel like celebrating Mother’s Day today.
To the mothers out there who have held tiny hands and lost them, the mothers who endure illness and manage to keep smiling for their children, those who care for others without complaint, daughters who’ve lost their mothers, those whose roles are reversed with their parents, those who remain strong when faced with phenomenal personal difficulty, mothers who have sacrificed so much in the name of love, those who are both mother and father, those who would give up everything to have one more day with the ones they have loved and lost, the mothers who shield their loved ones from the truth, who nurse a sick child tirelessly and always have a smile or kind word for others even when their day/week/month has been shit, those who become mothers to another’s children, those longing to hold their own bundle, friends who pick each other up from the floor. For all those wonderful women and so many more because as that definition proves, motherhood is not just about having children but being able to nurture and think of others whatever the relationship……today is for you. Your patience, strength and courage moves mountains, makes the impossible seem possible and shows us all the true meaning of love. You are the people I would like to honour on Mother’s Day and say thank you to as I don’t tell you often enough how amazing you are. Without you, that definition would be nothing.
Happy Mother’s Day.
Still smiling at ‘T is for tonic water’. It’s a nice day to be a mum, but I miss mine, who is in a home with dementia. I miss her lots.
I bet you do. Sending love to you Sarah xxx
Lovely inclusive piece, for all kinds of parents. I’m lucky to be mum to my MGG, and recognise that my partner’s boys at least like me a bit. And I’d like to recognise that he is both mum and dad to them. Families mean many things these days, but all just as valid wherever there is love.
Thank you so much for reading. Love is the key, I agree. I feel very lucky to know so many wonderful people with children and without who share their love with me and mine.
Lovely post, Fennel xxx
Thanks Juniper xxx
Now I’m in tears ….. Xxxxxxxx
Oh, lovely. We’re so lucky, aren’t we?
Absolutely! I try to remember that every time I find myself dealing with something difficult or feeling stressed. These women who do that every day are truly wonderful. x
such a beautiful and heart felt post I think many of us mums are super mums considering what we have to do in a day. Although my children are a lot older now but those early years blimey they flow by in a happy blur, dee x
Oh thank you so much Dee. Thank you for reading. x
Only just got around to reading this, in amongst all the juggling. Lovely post. Us mums are a special breed. Happy Mother’s Day to you. x x
In awe of what so many wonderful mums I know have achieved. Thank you for reading and commenting Suzanne – a very Happy Mother’s Day to you too xx